Ronnie D
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YOUR CART

7/30/2018

I Take My Dick Pics Like I Take My Coffee

With death, depression, and vegan milk.

Join me and the fabulous ​April Walterscheid for our lovely summer Sunday chat on the latest episode of Please Send Dick Pics.

7/30/2018

Ronnie D. . .

Like a tire-flattened cat at the gates of Shangri-La.
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7/25/2018

Shout-Out

To the rest of the crazy #PHX comics waitin in triple digits tonight for their 5-minute vision quest at Grand Avenue Comedy Sweat Lodge. ❤️
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7/24/2018

HO HO HO!!!

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7/17/2018

If I'm Not Lost at Sea. . .

On my Buck Moon Total Lunar Eclipse* sailing trip, I'll be performing at this show! 

This venue looks rad, so come get your tiki on with me. 

Purple Orchid Tiki Lounge
221 Richmond St
El Segundo, CA 90245

*No, this is not visible from the US, but this is THE longest total lunar eclipse of the 21st century, with totality clocking in at one hour and 43 minutes.
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Wednesday, August 1
​Live at the Purple Orchid
Purple Orchid Tiki Lounge
8:30 pm
​FREE!

7/10/2018

I'm in a LADY MOOD!

Art by the wonderful Shaun Clayton
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7/10/2018

Eureka!! It's LADY MOOD 6: The #SF Ov Rush!

I get so riley when I bleed in the Bay. Just ask that guy who tried to rob me on the BART Sunday. 

Sorry, buddy, but I'm in a LADY MOOD!

And I fucking win.
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You think a lady who finds herself out on the Barbary Coast alone is just gonna hand over all her shit to some lazy, good-for-nothing, THINKS-he's-intimidating MOTHER FUCKER?

Please.

​My body just got done PREPARING TO MAKE NEW LIFE.

​What'd you do today?

Oh that's right: You tried to take all my shit for nothin.

Sure, I'll give a man I barely know the best years of my life, but there is no way in hell you're getting my brand new backpack. 

Or my Windows Phone. 

*smh*

Anyways. . .

​I got 29 claims. Stake 'em before they're gone!

7/5/2018

Awww Yeah. . .

Walking down the street gnawin on one like it's a turkey leg at the Ren Faire.
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7/4/2018

BETTER COME TO THE QUAIL

I heard it's gonna be a lot of fun TONIGHT!
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(I won't be there. Not because I don't like pain, silly; you KNOW the Quail's my favorite room in town. But I'm not in town.)

7/2/2018

I'm a CAM GIRL Now!

Thought I'd take advantage of the sweet setup here where I'm catsitting. Try and make a couple bucks if I can. . .
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PS: #America, this is you on the left. 
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    In Case You Were Wondering . . . 

    Sometimes Ronnie D writes funny stuff. Sometimes she writes desperate teenage prose. Most times she just slams her feeble, little woman-hand onto the keyboard in an attempt to feel something, anything. 

    Go ahead and read it. What else are you gonna do anyways? Work?     Please.

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